Tuesday, 25 August 2020

在安不定的日子,夢遊


昨晚做了一個夢,一個奇怪的夢。 

 盛夏,我又回到了日本,在 W n M 的田裡幫忙。這實在讓我很開心,自往年在這裡住了一星期以後,便打算每年來一趟。可借,他們也快要搬家了,幸好在他們離開前還可以再看看田裡的風景。 農忙完畢,我便四處走走,雖然村子很小,但仍有不少未走過的地方。 

從大街一拐進一條小巷,才發現這裡是英國的唐人街,不過看上去像香港的糖街多些(哈哈)。一個外國男人忽然很用力地捉住我,忽然變得熱鬧的街道,路過的人不但沒有上前來幫我解困,只是圍觀訕笑。我用力爭扎,爭脫了洋男,便一直跑。走進一間屋去,再跑上樓梯,樓上的房間正在用舊電視機放映電影。

三個女孩子和一個外國人男孩子 -- 我的朋友 -- 歡迎我來,我們一聊起上來,放映變成背景音樂。但我其實並不知道他們是誰,我心裡感到孤單,嘗試理清到底我是在哪裡和正在做甚麼。 

 房內以文化大革命的物件作主題裝飾,這真是讓我感到很不舒服,我明明不可能有這種喜好的朋友,他們不可能不知道這些物件所代表的邪惡。房間暗暗的,電視裡放著的影片是關於一位在文化大革命時期寫書法的中國女孩的故事。而房內的其中一位女孩就是這影片的女主角。

這時,二個女孩子已經走了,男孩子吻別了女主角,再向我輕輕說再見。只有我和女主角的房間,她便和我聊起自己的身世。她告訴我她正在英國學習中文書法,所以會一直待這裡,也不知道會不會回老家。她是那種既瘦又四肢長長的美女,像那些荷理活電影中的中國女孩。她再說了一堆話,我沒有記住,然後她也走了,房間內只有我一個人。

我正在發呆,想着該到哪裡。



Echo by V: 

Great! I will be ready. With joy.... Here are some beginning thoughts According to Ernst Bloch, we are still capable of creating a new world from a utopia. Now we have to start. Life has been given into our hands. We should use our ability to think utopia, - against these vicious attacks on democracy. It seemed to be essential, including for Hannah Arendt, that people learned to believe in it at all and to remedy their grievances, that they would be able to create a better world. Like an intellectual General Staff we should act revolutionising this seemingly desperate reality towards a real, humane, civilised society that is sustainable for human beings. There is never enough tangible utopia! The counter concept to utopia – maybe is our sense of Home ? Not the home of origins, and not the home that must first come into existence, whose blurry, yearning images drives hope, like in Ernst Bloch's great illustrated book of utopias of all millennia and dimensions To make oneself at home, or "to land on this earth", means closing the gap in consciousness. But home as the reason and the network of relationships on which we depend, which - quite literally - keep us alive and inspired. Like Hannah Arendt speaks about the importance of her friends, that she loves them and not the one nation. We all need this kind of emotional stimulation, and the opportunity where and with whom we want to be?

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